How do I answer my toddler's questions about genitals?

As parents, we can get anxious when children ask about anything remotely sexual. But your child's curiosity about genitals is no different than her questions about eyes, ears, feet, noses, and other less private parts. And genitals are pretty interesting, as body parts go. Her questions are only natural — after all, she has to learn about private parts from someone, and it's best for that someone to be you.

How should you respond? Be direct, and stay matter-of-fact. Follow the rule of thumb: "Is this how I would tell her about elbows or knees?" Give her the anatomically correct name for the body part and avoid baby talk — using funny or silly words will just confuse her and, if anything, makes the discussion a bigger deal. If she asks what they're for, you can say that genitals are for going to the bathroom. If you feel comfortable mentioning that they're also used for making babies, that's okay, too. She may not get it, but a child this age has no understanding of sex and won't make that connection.

She may also ask why Daddy's or her brother's genitals are different from hers. Point out that each person is unique: Her best friend's eyes are blue while hers are brown, and Grandma's nose is smaller than Grandpa's. In the same vein, boys' private parts look different from girls'. Keep it simple, and if you don't act embarrassed, she won't be, either.